“New Year, New Me!!!”- How to Mean it When You Say It?

It’s the beginning of the new year which means everyone is creating New Year’s resolutions, setting goals, decorating vision boards, and proclaiming “New Year, New Me”. All of this is admirable however data shows that 41% of Americans make New Year’s Resolutions which center around self-improvement, weight, money, and relationships. Out of the 41% of the population that set goals for the new year, only 9.2% felt they were successful in achieving their resolution. Now some of you will look at those numbers and say, “Well there’s no point of me setting a goal then. I already know the data is stacked against me!”. I challenge you to consider what you can do differently to ensure you are making consistent progress toward your goals.

When I consider where my life was 2 years ago; it was drastically different than where I am today. This didn’t come from me running a mental, emotional, or physical marathon daily. It came from small, intentional, and consistent baby steps.

Did I push myself? “YES!”
Was it hard? “YEP!”
Did I want to give up? “On more than one occasion!”
Did I accomplish every single goal I had? “NOPE!”
Am I in a better place because I stayed the course? ABSOLUTELY!!!

Where do I start?

That is a great question and one that many people get stuck on when it comes to setting goals and establishing a plan. The starting point is simple, you need to decide what you want and understand why. I’ve found that in setting goals for myself such as finishing graduate school, starting a business, or deciding to eat healthier, the goal wasn’t what pushed me. The ‘why’ behind the goal is what drove me to continue moving forward even when I didn’t feel like it. When you understand why you desire the goal that you jotted down on paper and you can visualize what achieving that goal will do for you; then the goal becomes more than something on a list, it becomes your mission and purpose. Why do you want to lose weight? Why do you want to save money? Why do you want to improve or cut off that relationship? It isn’t the act of doing the task that really matters, what matters is how achieving that goal can change your life.

Being Intentional

There is no goal that was achieved by happenstance or a genie that floated out of a bottle that magically melted off 20 pounds and put an extra $10,000 in the bank. You must work the plan, or your goals are just dreams. Being intentional in your thoughts and behavior is key to achieving any goal you have. For me, my goal this year is to feed my mind positivity. To accomplish this goal, I’ve had to become very intentional about what I am spending my time doing. I journal a prayer and read a scripture to start my day, I do a quick 20-minute workout, then listen to worship music while I am getting ready for the day.  While I am driving to the office I listen to podcast such as “Super Soul” or “Therapy for Black Girls”. The toughest one is I’ve decided to put my phone on ‘do not disturb’ between the hours of 10pm- 8am so that I can spend time reading. I’ve had to cut out guilty pleasures like watching a million makeup tutorials on YouTube or vegging out on Netflix at the end of the day. In being intentional with my time, I’ve found that I feel better throughout the day. Even though separately these changes are small, I end the day feeling as if I have accomplished something. Being intentional does not mean you won’t have an off day or that you are going to check everything off your list every day. It means you are choosing to make an effort toward your overall goal in small ways each day.

Be Consistent- Take Baby Steps

When I look back at the progress that I’ve made personally over the past few years, there isn’t a single action that I can pinpoint and say “there, that’s what I did to achieve my goals”. What I can say is that by remaining consistent and taking baby steps each day, week, and month I was able to see the overall progress over time. The goals you have for yourself are not likely to be accomplished overnight. Accepting that what you desire for yourself will take time will not only take the pressure off, but it will allow you to enjoy the journey. Sometimes we can get so caught up on the end result that we only see our failures and never take time to celebrate our success. I have become a fan of keeping the ‘sticky note’ app on my laptop. I use this not only as a “To Do List” but also as a tool to track all that I have accomplished.  Create a “living” list of what you need to do. This is a list that you can add to as things come up. But DON’T delete what you have completed. Create a “DONE List” and track everything you have completed on your “To Do List”. Seeing this list grow will help you to know that your efforts aren’t in vain and that you are making progress. These are the baby steps. Baby steps no matter how small can move you forward if you commit to staying consistent.

But What If I Get Distracted?

I’m smart enough to know that life happens and that there will be times where you just can’t get to those 10 tasks on your “To Do List”. For me, very recently my daughter came down with the flu which meant lots of cuddle time with mommy. And guess what? That “To Do List” was now on hold. But once my daughter was feeling better I pulled up my list and saw the task I needed to get to as well as the extensive list of items that was already on my “DONE List”. See, I told you that would come in handy. For me, taking a few days off didn’t ruin my record of accomplishment of taking baby steps. I was reminded of all I accomplished as well as what I need to continue working on. Life happens to everyone and sometimes we just need a break. Take the time you need but get back to the business of working on your goals. Your goals don’t stop existing because you needed a break and you are not a failure because you needed a time out. Distractions happen but as long as you remember that slow and steady wins the race you will continue moving forward.

We all have desires for ourselves whether it be personally, professionally, mentally, spiritually, emotionally, physically, etc. The difference between those who set goals and those who achieve them is the individual’s willingness to be intentional and consistent. If you find that you need someone to hold you accountable, ask your spouse, friend, colleague, minister, or find a local counselor or life coach who can walk with you through this process.

If you would like to chat with me about goal setting, please contact me directly to schedule a free 30-minute consultation. I pray that you accomplish everything your heart desires and I would love to hear your success stories at the end of the year.

God Bless!!!